A woman has been criticized online after being upset by her partner’s suggestion to sleep in another bed.
In a post on London-based discussion site Momsnet, the woman explained her dilemma. “My partner has said that he no longer wants to share a bedroom or bed with me,” she wrote, adding that she was upset and upset by her decision. “He’s been treated for OCD and is recovering.” [obsessive compulsive disorder]However, this has never been an issue before.
“I asked him why he felt this way. He just said he wanted his own bedroom and he wanted to sleep alone. It felt dirty,” she added.
OCD is a mental health disorder characterized by recurrent, intrusive and unwanted thoughts, images, or impulses that cause distress or repetitive behavior. People with OCD may experience intense anxiety and be particular about how they dress as a result of their obsessions. This extends to fear of disease, concern about pollution, concern about symmetry, and other intrusive thoughts. To reduce the anxiety caused by these thoughts, people with OCD become obsessed. These repetitive behaviors may include actions such as repeatedly checking things, counting, washing hands, or arranging things in a particular way.
Clinical psychologist, author and podcaster Marianne Trent, Ph.D. Newsweek: “It’s not uncommon for people who suffer from OCD to decide that they want to sleep in a different room or in a different bed because they feel that sleeping separately gives them better control over the variables that caused their distress.” is. .”
Symptoms may worsen at night, Trent added, although this is not true for all patients. This period will be smaller. “
For this reason, it is understandable that men with OCD may feel better and more comfortable sleeping alone at night. However, it doesn’t always make it easier for the other party.
“It’s natural for partners to feel like rejection, especially if they’ve enjoyed intimate relationships before,” says Trent.
On Mom’s Net, women wrote that their partner’s decisions affected their feelings of self-esteem. “I’m really upset right now. I’m good enough to have sex with him, but I’m not good enough to have sex with him.” “
“It is important to remember that when it comes to OCD, such changes are likely to be a sign of increased distress and mean new routines, rules and regimes are being formulated. ‘, said Trent. “So when something like this happens, it can be very difficult and impactful on a relationship, but it is important to separate the person from their OCD symptoms and think about how we can best support them while maintaining the relationship. .”
In fact, among hundreds of comments on the MomsNet post, users seem to agree that women should respect their partners’ wishes and try to sleep apart. Some even said it was unreasonable for her to be upset.
One user posted, ‘Would you like to try it? Just sleep,’ and another user said, ‘I agree with this. I’m sending it, but the 10-person room is separate,” he posted. Many years have passed. This is heaven. “
“Honesty OP [original poster] If he just wants to sleep separately, I don’t think he should be offended,” read another reply.
Psychologist Dr. Shelby Harris was told before Newsweek She wondered if sleeping in a separate bed from her partner, which she called a “sleep divorce,” could save the relationship.
A 2022 study revealed that more couples are choosing to sleep in separate beds. A quarter of her National Sleep Foundation survey respondents (25%) said they would rather sleep apart.
But for the couple, it’s clear that the suggestion to sleep apart was causing problems. Trent said the couple should work together toward an amicable resolution.
“It’s important to remember that both sides of the relationship need to feel that their needs are being met,” Trent added. “So if OCD is affecting a couple’s relationship, working with a therapist to address these issues can be important.”
Newsweek Details of this incident could not be confirmed.
If you have a personal dilemma, let us know by: [email protected]. You can seek expert advice on relationships, family, friends, money, work, and your story could be featured. Newsweek‘What should I do?’ section.