Over the past few years, we’ve seen conversations about mental health become very common, both in private and public.
The two writers have teamed up on a new project to break even more taboos for the youngest of us. suicide awareness month .
A new picture book by Dennis Gillan and Stephen Pill, who met at the University of Delaware, aims to encourage children to think about their own mental health and the well-being of those around them. In this era of climate change and social turmoil, checking in with those around you is an important way to care for your community.
According to the authors, simply asking friends and family and listening to their reactions can go a long way. In fact, they say even something as simple as sharing a compliment can change someone’s day or even save their life.
At least that was the case with UD graduate Pihl.
“In my sophomore year, I decided I didn’t want to be here anymore,” he recalls. “Frankly, I didn’t want to. I just didn’t want to be here. I didn’t want to be bullied anymore. I didn’t want to be sad anymore. , today is that day. I’m out. I had a plan and everything.”
Thankfully, something happened that changed the course of that plan and his life, he said.
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“It was like my second-to-last period, and the kids came to me before the bell,” he recalled. “I got new shoes like that week. A kid who didn’t really like , who wasn’t super friendly, came up to me and said, “Hey, I like your shoes.”
Yeah his shoes.
That true story inspired the title of a newly released children’s book.
“A little compliment changed my day,” said Pihl. “I’m still here. So it definitely had a big impact on me.”
Pihl graduated from the University of Delaware in 2022 and is now back in his hometown of Massachusetts, working in the Cognitive Neuroscience Laboratory at Children’s Hospital Boston. He plans to continue his education in developmental neurophysiology in his MD/PhD program, he said.
The storybook Nice Shoes! follows Derek, a young boy who has a tough day when everything seems to go wrong. He woke up late, barely made it to the bus, and forgot his gym clothes. he’s not going well with a math quiz.
Derek begins to wonder if every day will be as bad as today.
Just as Derek is about to leave school, the most popular kid in school stops and says he likes his shoes. Suddenly nothing is as bad as before.
It may seem simple, but Pill says he couldn’t have made the book without his co-author and friend Dennis Gillan.
Gillan, Executive Director Half of the Sorrow Foundationhas devoted her life to speaking out about mental health issues, including suicide prevention.
“We met at a Friends4Friends event. [at UD} called Fall Fest, where Dennis was the keynote speaker and I was one of three students that were asked to speak about their struggles with mental health,” Pihl recalled. “After he heard my story he wanted to stay in touch because he said he couldn’t get it out of his head. Then, after a couple of years, he pitched the idea of writing a children’s book and here we are!” Pihl said.
“I always thought Stephen’s story was unique,” Gillan explained. “… Finally I said, ‘We got to do something with this. And then by that time, I had a foundation. And we had some money to self publish.”
Gillan told his friend, “I’m thinking about a children’s book … ‘I can’t do it without you. It’s your story. Can we do it together?’ ”
Pihl’s response? “Hell, yeah!”
Gillan is originally from Valley Cottage, New York, and now lives in Greenville, South Carolina. He has traveled around the country for years, talking to schools about the importance of mental health and suicide prevention.
Sadly, his career path became evident after losing two brothers, Mark and Matt, to suicide.
“My brothers, I wish they could have benefited from hearing this, or a kind word,” Gillan reflected. “They may be here still. So that’s my connection. And that’s … you know, I never wanted to be a public speaker for suicide prevention. But God had other plans for me. And here I am, and I go around and I get to meet great people like Stephen.”
While the topic of mental health may be discussed much more openly than in the past, it is still not common to discuss a topic like suicide with young children.
This was something Pihl and Gillan thought a lot about while creating this story.
“It’s really understanding that you can break this stuff down into very basic components; it doesn’t have to be disordered thought,” Pihl said. “But it’s just — if you’ve had a bad day, you qualify to talk about your mental health. And so we understood that we can break down this complex, intimidating subject of suicide [and] Learned helplessness. And you can break it down into simple components of just bad or negative thoughts.”
“We talked about grief,” Gillan added. “And in the book we are very intentional [it]You know, we have kids ages 4 to 10 who are probably reading this book. I never mentioned suicide, [just] The person is sad and thinks every day could be like this.”
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The authors believe their storybooks can serve as starting points for all sorts of discussions about emotions, mental health struggles, and suicide.
They said writing the book helped Gillan and Pill, who are already very open about their own mental health, to be even more open and honest about it.
“It allows us to express ourselves more clearly,” says Pihl. “And it allows us to reach cohorts of different ages, right? It can also improve the communication of … populations like children,” Pill explained.
Beyond the idea that a compliment can bypass someone’s bad day, what does the author most hope to take away from children reading it?
“Kindness. Kindness always wins. Love always wins,” said Gillan.
Pihl uses another analogy to make the point.
“I think it’s simple: ‘It’s okay.’ And it’s not easy to see the sun through blackout curtains, is it? That’s where your friends come in. Then they say, ‘Let’s move the curtains around a bit.’ ‘ says. It’s about moving the curtains, showing the sun, showing that everything is fine,” he explained.
“Nice Shoes!” is available from Amazon and Barnes & Noble.
For more information on Dennis Gillan, visit his website https://dennisgillan.com.
suicide prevention resources
If you or someone you know has suicidal thoughts: call 988 Or use some of the following available resources:
