Texts are inherently difficult to decipher. Unlike face-to-face interactions and calls, these short digital messages have many nonverbal clues, such as eye contact, gestures, and smiles, providing an important context for what a person is trying to say. As a result, texts are often misunderstood and sometimes related killers. the study I discovered it.
For those with concern, texting can be particularly difficult to navigate. But Communication digitally It can reduce feelings of anxiety by helping people feel self-conscious or uncontrollable. Some text messages ambiguity can also allow anxiety people to fill in the gaps and interpret messages that are more negative than they intended. This can cause a sudden increase in anxiety levels.
One of the worst texts to send with someone with concern: “Can we talk?”
If you are unsure, this may have sent a tremble to your spine. Otherwise you may wonder why this is important. Below, the therapist breaks it all.
Why is this possible that it can be caused so much for people with anxiety?
Juan Algar / Getty Images
“The ambiguity and lack of tone and context in this type of message leave a huge amount of room for interpretation and catastrophe.” Alex Oliver Gunsa licensed marriage and family therapist with private practices in San Francisco told HuffPost.
Text messages do not have specific nonverbal clues, so they always assume the tone and intention of the sender, Olivergans said. For example, a Research published in 2020 Responding to an invitation to go to watch the movie with a “K” emphasized that if the sender actually didn’t have enough time to enter a full reply, the recipient could assume that they weren’t eager to their friends. However, if you spoke on the phone, you may have heard the warmth of their voices and noticed that they were excited about the plan.
Assume that when anxiety drips, others’ intentions can take negative turns. Ariana GalligerOne of the main symptoms of stress, trauma, resilience programs and anxiety at the director of Gabbe Wellbeing Office and Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center. Devastating thoughtsor you tend to believe that the worst outcomes of a situation can happen very often.
“Can you talk?” There is already a negative connotation. “Who said it, ‘Can we talk?’ And did you have some great news to share? ” Oliver Guns said.
Throwing anxiety into the mix, people may wonder if their relationship is over or if they’re fired from their job. “Can we talk?” ambiguity can be anti-rum or cause the worst. Anxious brain begins to prepare for the horrifying consequences it had imagined.
“It can be really painful and tiring,” Gariger said.
What is a better way to phrase text messages?
Jeffbergen / Getty Images
It is best to be specific and provide details about what you want to discuss to avoid unnecessary worries about those with anxiety. When composed, be aware that text is easily misunderstood.
For example, instead of “Can you talk?” or similar questions, ask if you can chat about your weekend plans or meet up to prepare for a big presentation at work.
Another option is to use this template from Oliver-Gans. [the topic you want to discuss]. Will it be in 15 minutes today? “This minimizes ambiguity, sets clear expectations, and gives people a better understanding of the scope of the conversation.
If you need to create sensitive topics, it is best to be clear and direct.
“Some extra words in your message can save everyone’s anxiety and give others the opportunity to prepare them for the vaster conversations you want to have with them,” she said.
Also, by including positive thoughts, you can burn some sense of security. If there are particularly harsh topics that need to be addressed, it may be best to wait until you can mention them in person or over the phone.
“Anything that is difficult to interpret via text or easily misunderstood without body language or tone of voice should be avoided,” Oliver Guns explained.
If you are on the receiving end of an ambiguous message, you can ask follow-up questions.
“I recommend looking for explanations rather than avoiding evasion, anti-mination or catastrophe,” Oliver Guns said. It’s two-way: seeking more information and getting facts can stop the pattern of what-if thinking on that track.
Finally, for the person who sent it, if the offensive text appears to be out of character, consider your history with them. Ask yourself if they could have just sent a written message that was carelessly written. There may be a brief explanation – they were probably multitasking! – That does not include the end of the world scenario.
As Oliver Guns pointed out, “We all make mistakes in the text and write text poorly from time to time.” This article was originally published Huffpost.
