Narcissists use these tricks to win arguments — don’t fall for them: therapist

sex and relationships

by taylor knight

It’s not worth it.

Dr. Annie Zimmerman, therapist, runner @your_pocket_therapist On TikTok, we shared 5 signs that you’re having an argument with a narcissist.

“It’s almost impossible to have a healthy discussion or a healthy conflict with a narcissist,” the therapist said. “You can’t argue logically with a narcissist, because narcissists tend to use one of these techniques.”

In a 41-second TikTok clip posted on Aug. 15, she lists all the behavioral traits that narcissists exhibit when confronted.

“One of the best ways to recognize if someone is a narcissist or has narcissistic tendencies is to notice how they argue,” the video’s voiceover reveals.

Dr. Zimmerman reveals that denial is the first red flag when dealing with a narcissist.

“They tend to deny their role in everything. They are unable to take responsibility on their part and any apology becomes meaningless or superficial,” the therapist added.

Another narcissist red flag is if the person deflects the conversation. The therapist will point out your insecurities by shifting the conversation to you rather than themselves. “You’re raising the issue, and then all of a sudden you find yourself talking about your shortcomings,” she explains.

He also points out that you should be careful when a potential narcissist tries to play the victim, as this can upset you and make you think you did something wrong.

Some conflicts can become very intense when egoists try to gaslight the situation, Dr. Zimmerman continues, by making them feel like it’s their fault for bringing up the issue.

She ends the video with a fifth red flag. That’s when a person “tries to attack, becomes aggressive and defensive.”

This toxic mannerism resonated with many TikTokers, who noticed similarities in their conflicts.

“Today I realized that I was a narcissist without even realizing it,” one person confessed. “I do all these things and I don’t think I’m a bad person.”

“My mother is a narcissist and no one knows she’s a narcissist except me,” another admitted.

“My 33+ years of marriage. I’m finally free!!!” Congratulations to the divorced.

Others have suggested additional red flags that can indicate someone is a narcissist.

One person commented: “It’s a silent treatment that punishes you for disagreeing with them or doing what they say.” “Or a personal attack or a lie!!!”

On the other hand, some people want to know how to deal with egomania.

“Please tell me how to argue with the other person,” the warden demanded. “What are her five signs of a healthy discussion?”

While they waited for Dr. Zimmerman’s response, a TikToker responded and shared how to have a healthy discussion.

“They accept the other person’s point of view, they actually try to work it out, they’re always ready to say sorry if there’s a shortcoming, and they want the best for both parties.”