One mother said she was embarrassed to explain how she had raised her children.
Posting on the subreddit r/parenting (an online forum for advice on the ups and downs of parenting), a mother of young children was talking to someone in her life about how she was parenting. , especially when it comes to being grateful and compassionate and not wanting to guilt or manipulate them.
However, she was soon criticized for raising her children in the opposite way of gratitude.
She was told she was raising “qualified adults” after stating that she didn’t want her children to feel like they owed her.
in her Reddit postshe explained that she didn’t want her children to feel like they “owed” or “had to pay” for what she was doing as a mother.
“I give them homes, food, clothes, love, etc., which I do not demand ‘repayment,'” she wrote. “My children weren’t born wanting. It’s my job to make sure they get what they need to survive and thrive. I will never give them those things.” I won’t hold back.”
In a conversation she repeated all that, she was accused of trying to raise “entitled adults” who would not appreciate anything. However, her mother pointed out that it was actually the other way around.
“I do everything in my power to make my children appreciate what they have. I’m lucky,” she continued. As a parent, she said she was grateful and still tries to teach her children the importance of empathy for those less fortunate than themselves.
She gave other examples, sharing that she wants her children to appreciate such things too, even when receiving gifts. “I expect them to tell the person ‘thank you.’ .”
However, she admits that children feel “owed” to her or feel grateful to her when parents are just doing for them what they should be doing for them. never wanted.
All individuals, including children, have the right to their own autonomy and life choices.
Parents can control their children’s decisions, make them feel obligated to follow a certain path, or express gratitude to their children just because they meet their children’s basic needs. It doesn’t mean
In a world so often focused on business relationships, this mother’s commitment to raising children who understand the value of empathy and compassion is the best way she can raise them. Her realization that her children weren’t born as she wanted speaks to her deep understanding of what parenthood can bring.
She chose to feed them out of love and compassion without attaching any conditions that could lead to resentment or a twisted sense of obligation.
People agreed that she was doing the right thing for them, with no appreciative guilt about her caring for them.
“I agree with you, and I think what you’re trying to distinguish is that they should be grateful for what they have, but only because they’re parents.” Doesn’t mean I have to thank you for it,” noted one Reddit user.
Another user wrote, “Some time ago I tried to thank my parents for everything they did for me. My mother said I owe them nothing. And one day I will have a child. I said that if I decided to have the baby, I could pay it back,” she added. Being a good mother myself is what my parents have done for me. ”
“Your children owe you nothing regarding the basics of life. Feed them, provide a roof, provide a safe and loving environment. It’s all what you sign up for.” and shouldn’t be cookies or pats on the back for it, ’cause it’s part of the job,” wrote a third user.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news and lifestyle writer whose writings delve into contemporary issues and experiences.
