i can’t do that my mind wanders. I can’t sit still. I can’t concentrate for that long. i fall asleep I have too many noisy thoughts.
If any of these thoughts occurred to you on your first or first few attempts at meditation, congratulations — you meditated!
Many people perceive meditation as a magical moment of transformation. But meditation is not perfect. It’s about consciousness. Being aware that your mind is wandering, that you are tired, that you cannot sit still, that your mind is in a hurry, that is the point of meditation.
Not understanding the purpose of meditation is a common mistake, says Judson Brewer, an associate professor at Brown University’s Warren-Alpert School of Medicine and a leading meditation expert. “I’ve done this for 10 years,” he said. “I banged my head against the wall thinking I needed to focus on my breath. I couldn’t do that, so I was doing something wrong.”
If you’re struggling with meditation, Brewer suggests reminding yourself that the essence of meditation is that it helps you learn how the mind works. I complained to him that I was having trouble meditating.
“I told her to be curious,” he said. “When she notices that there are thoughts, can she notice them? But be careful with it. “This is what my mind is like.” You have just learned something about how your mind works. “
Even the fact that you think you’ve failed your meditation is worth noting, says Brewer. Are you forming a loop of self-blaming habits? “It doesn’t matter what your mind is doing,” said Brewer. “All information is good information. Be aware.”
Here are some simple tips to help you learn how to meditate and incorporate meditation and mindfulness into your day.
meditate in the morning Morning meditation is a good way to ground yourself, and studies show that regular morning practice lower stress hormones with time. I created a morning ritual of doing a short guided meditation over coffee. Meditating during your other morning rituals can help form a habit and make you less likely to fall asleep.
use the app. It’s much easier to start practicing meditation with a little help. Many apps — Headspace, Calm, Ten Percent Happier, Unplug — offer free trials and programs. The apps are also very diverse. Unplug has quirky topics like “Meditation quick fix” and “Before you send that email you didn’t want to send” meditation.
feel your feet Focus on your feet for a few seconds to spend some mindful time at work. how do they feel? Are they hot and sweaty? Are they tingling? do they hurt? Does one leg feel different? Think about the connection between your feet and the ground. When you’re aware of your feet, you’re less likely to let your mind wander. Brewer calls his feet his “anxiety-free zone.” And focusing on the feet literally feels grounded.
Try coherent breathing. Sit quietly, inhale for a count of six, and exhale for a count of six. You can stand upright or lie down. Place your hands on your stomach. If this is too difficult, start by counting to three or four and work your way up. The ultimate goal of this technique is to slow his breathing down to 5 breaths per minute. Practice 5 minutes a day.
Pay attention to your five senses. Start by taking a few calm breaths. Look at her five things around you right now. Items on your desk, such as lamps, notepads, and pens, or trees and rocks on your walk. Touch him four: cloth fabric, books, leaves and cats. Ask me three things. Notice the barking of dogs, the clicking of keyboards, and the laughter in the break room. Smell two. Smell the detergent left on your clothes. Taste a dish End your meditation with a treat from chocolate, fruit, or the office candy dish.
Brush your teeth and meditate. This is my favorite because it’s so easy to do. Brush your teeth, but focus on the hissing sound of your toothbrush. Notice the taste of toothpaste and the foam that spreads in your mouth. As you rinse your mouth, focus on the coolness of the water. Add a new element of awareness by standing on one leg while brushing your teeth.
Gray hair is undergoing a renaissance of sorts during the pandemic as more women turn their hair back to their natural color. photo essay of a silver-haired woman. The group Gray & Proud has more than 31,000 members on her Facebook and the hashtag #silversisters celebrates Gray on her Instagram.
But while such hair may be heralded on social media, women say they still face discrimination when they go gray. Journal of Women and Aging. Researchers at the University of Exeter interviewed 80 women recruited from Facebook’s closed Go Gray group and found two conflicting themes. But they also report moments when they feel more respected and relatable.
Researchers found that in deciding to go gray, many women felt they were choosing between feeling authentic and appearing competent. Below are some of the comments collected by the researchers.
“I work with college students. Before I stopped dyeing my hair, they thought I was much younger. Now they treat me like an older person.” — assuming I can’t relate to them.— Tracy, 40s
“I love my natural hair color. I’m comfortable, I love who I am and who I’m turning into. I noticed that I was seen and treated more fragile.” — Mattie, 50s
However, women also said there are benefits to going gray, such as feeling authentic, greater freedom, friendliness, and respect.
“I actually feel better about myself because my appearance matches my real age. It’s pretty liberating.” — Rose, 50s
“Just recently, I’ve noticed more and more people wanting to talk to me or approach me in public. I notice young men and women in particular conversing with me. As a nurse, I feel more welcome for being knowledgeable, trustworthy and competent.” — Katie, 60s
“I find young people to be very polite to me. Lol. I’m older so maybe I have some kind of default respect? That’s so weird! – Alex, 40s
Today’s daily life coach James A. CohnA neuroscientist at the University of Virginia who studies the effects of holding hands.
advice: Hold hands with your loved ones.
Reasons to try: Coan used an MRI machine to study the effects on the brain of holding hands with strangers and loved ones. Participants included heterosexual and same-sex couples. To simulate stress, participants were given a mild electric shock while holding hands with a stranger, friend, or loved one.
Holding hands reduced stress overall, but it had the most calming effect when holding hands with a loved one. In particular, the effects seen on the brain were similar to pain relievers.
How to: Hold hands early and often during walks, watching TV at night, or while waiting for food at a restaurant.
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