When Sen. John Fetterman checked into the hospital last month for clinical depression, critics questioned whether he could serve a six-year term.
Mental illness is often described as: unavoidable condition.
Everyone’s experience is different, and those who have had an episode of mental illness are at a higher risk of experiencing mental health problems in the future. , says David Mandel, director of the Pennsylvania Center for Mental Health.
» Read more: Senator John Fetterman hospitalized for depression. Here’s what you need to know about common but serious disorders.
“With proper treatment, you can go years without experiencing the main symptoms of depression,” Mandel said.
The Inquirer spoke to four Philadelphia citizens about their experiences with depression, the treatments that have worked for them, and how they are staying connected to their mental health care.
“Different lens”
It was his absentee father who first broke Taj Murdoch’s heart.
“There’s no father figure to tell you he’s proud of you,” said the 48-year-old of North Philly. did you?”
Murdoch was a successful barber and had many professional athlete clients. However, the lack of male role models in his early years made him realize his goals were misplaced. , he now says. “Have a car, clothes, pockets full of money, and a handful of women.”
By 2008, his self-destructive behavior had caught up with him.
After violating the law, he served two years in prison for a DUI violation. There, for the first time, someone told him about his behavior in the context of trauma and depression.
It never occurred to him to consider his experience in terms of mental health.
“Honestly, it gave me some solid grounding…a different lens,” he said.
In prison, he began praying, meditating, and journaling. He continues that practice to this day. He also tried medication but stopped because it made him feel worse.
After being released, he returned to barbering, A mentoring program for young men called Men of Courage.
» Read more: We offered free therapy to black men. | | Opinion
Around 2016, he began treatment with Black Men Heal, a non-profit mental health organization that provides free services to black men. Since then he has been in therapy. It wasn’t always easy.
Last year, Murdoch struggled with depression. But he has the tools to keep going and he knows the value of investing time in himself.
“I try to tap into what gives me joy,” he said. “The more time you spend with yourself, the better you become.”
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colors popped out again
Kelly Sendall, 44, moved from Georgia to New Jersey in September 2019 to take up a position as an Assistant Professor of Biology at Rider University. She had few friends when the pandemic hit and Lawrence Her Township College closed, so she went online.
She was dating someone, but they broke up.then she slipped to depression. She put off her exercise, got more sleep, and lay in bed watching reruns of NBC-TV dramas for hours. endoplasmic reticulum while binging Doritos. Orange cheese covered her fingers and sheets.
“I felt stuck,” she said.
she moved She moved to the East Kensington area of Philadelphia, hoping that city life would rejuvenate her.
But the change of scenery didn’t help. She went from being “monotonous” to being “surprised by nothing”. For example, you may disagree with another professor over classroom scheduling issues.
A friend urged her to contact a psychiatrist, but everyone she tried was booked.
“This is one of the shortcomings of our healthcare system,” she said. “When you need help most, you can’t get it.”
» Read more: How to Prepare for a Meeting with a Therapist
Eventually, she found a virtual mental health service called Hers. Doctors prescribed medications to treat depression and generalized anxiety disorder. She was then referred to a psychiatrist, but because she had to pay $150 out-of-pocket, she was unable to see a regular doctor.
She also joins the Orangetheory Fitness Gym where she does circuits on treadmills, rowing and weightlifting machines.
With each passing day, she became stronger physically and mentally, and the weight of her depression began to lighten.
One day last summer, Sendall was in a Maryland salt marsh with a biology buddy studying the effects of rising sea levels. The sun was out. The temperature was perfect. Green grass like reeds burst against the blue sky. Her heart felt sharp for the first time in a long time.
“Suddenly I looked around and was like, ‘I feel so good right now,'” Sendor said.
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“I don’t know how to express it”
At 15, Rose Kahn felt like she was sinking to the bottom of a lake.
“I didn’t want to die,” she recalls. “I just wanted everything to stop.”
One day, my mother swallowed a whole aspirin or ibuprofen while she was at work. Eleven years later she doesn’t remember which was which. Many of the details are blocked.
Her brother called 911 and Khan spent nearly a week in pediatrics in 2012.
At the time, she was a sophomore at a mostly white, conservative high school on Long Island. Growing up Muslim in post-9/11 New York, she said her peers made her feel ostracized. Her parents immigrated to America from Guyana, her one of the poorest countries in South America. Their experience was about survival and making life better for themselves and later for their children. Khan said she didn’t know how to tell them how depressed she was.
“I needed help and didn’t know how to describe it,” says Khan, now 26. I remembered.
After being discharged from the hospital, Khan said: The therapist she was assigned to go to therapy didn’t work out. She clung to her hopes that her life would be better once she graduated.
But while attending New York University in 2016, she became increasingly anxious and depressed. She felt herself sinking into rock bottom again.
“Anxiety makes you feel like you can’t quiet the noise in your head, and depression feels like a lack of internal noise,” Khan recalled.
» Read more: Tips from 3 Philadelphia-area mental health providers to make sure your therapist is the best fit
She started seeing a new therapist who clicked and still sees regularly. Finding the right therapist is key, she said, Khan said.
She also takes low-dose sertraline, a generic version of the commonly prescribed antidepressant Zoloft.
Graduate student currently studying social work and policy at the University of Pennsylvania, Kern Still experiencing ups and downs. But those dips are manageable. She recognizes that “healing is a highly non-linear process.”
Every night she tries to write down three things that went well that day. It can be something small, like turning in your homework on time. She spends her time doing what she loves, whether it’s browsing the shelves in her bookstore, organizing her Center City apartment, or watching movies. Abbott Elementary SchoolShe and her friends talk about their feelings.
She learned to ask for help.
‘he was listening’
Matthew Anticoli started living alone in the fall of 2020. he is now 25 years old The Abington native had just graduated from college He moved to Bloomington, Indiana to complete his PhD in American Studies. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, the business has closed, as have the few LGBTQ spaces where he could be a part of the community.
Others in similar situations may have felt lonely, but Anticoli said his brain made him believe he was “actually alone.” He felt a deep loneliness.
Realizing that he was struggling, he spoke with the professor about taking the course load off and making room to better himself. got worse.
One night, Anticory called a college counselor after experiencing suicidal thoughts for several days. He hoped to get a therapy session. Instead, a police car arrived at his house and took him to the psych ward. A nearby hospital where he was placed on suicide watch.
He didn’t believe he would get better until his first therapy session.
“He listened to me,” Anticory said of the therapist he spoke to.
With that affirmation, he agreed to try group therapy, mindfulness training, various medications, and other programs offered at the hospital.
» Read more: John Fetterman has depression.If you’re struggling too, here’s how to get help
Anticoli was discharged from the hospital after about a week. he decided to go home. He went first to his parents’ house in Abington, then to his place in Philadelphia. He feels good enough to take a part-time job at UPS.
Last spring he felt ready for more challenges. He got a job at Mental Health Partnerships, his provider of nonprofit behavioral health services in Philadelphia, training people on how to respond to mental health crises. He says work is healing for him.
Anticoli knows he may suffer another episode of depression or anxiety. But his experience gives him hope that he can get better.
“I will be able to get over it again,” he said.
The Inquirer would like to talk to residents in the Philadelphia area about their experiences navigating mental health services in their community. If you have a story to share, email Health his reporter Abraham Gutman. [email protected].
