Nana is out: To quote a classic comic: “It’s never good. It’s never good.”
You never know when a relationship between two people, which certainly sounds like an open marriage to me, will become someone else’s business. My grandparents are also sexually independent people. This is between Nana and Pop Pop and any others they choose to include.
end. This is all the answers to your specific questions. But asking that raises another question.
Because that’s either a very precocious 5 month old baby you had there already asking where Nana is. — or it’s way too early to worry about what your dear children will think about things they may never know.
Or are we projecting our own discomfort onto our children because it feels better to spin to protect the innocent?
Whatever the motivation, I now want to write about the responsibility of parents to teach their children what is work and what is not.
Sure, people can say why they’re not coming if they want to — “I’m sniffling, but otherwise I’d like to see you” — but they have a responsibility to us. You don’t even have to explain or apologize unless you owe them an explanation. really sorry. “Oh, not today.” That’s a complete and acceptable out.
So. I can see that you did a good job of dodging when Nana happened to be out of town. But if Nana is simply absent rather than absent, no explanatory warning is needed. No need to look for other true explanations to make up for her. “Nana has other plans today”, “Nana is busy”, “Nana can’t be here”. Whether she’s doing something you find offensive, she’s doing something you don’t find offensive, or alphabetizing her socks, these are enough.
As your child grows and asks for more information, model boundaries and respond accordingly. “I miss my Nana again today, but I don’t need to know why someone isn’t coming. Let’s respect people’s privacy.” Repeat this and normalize it. This applies to everyone, not just Nana.
For parents, it’s important that you and your husband are prepared to approach your future teenagers before they keep inviting you to talk about privacy and secrecy. is a good thing. -Lies to everyone around me and to my face- (even though I did it to my parents) dialogue.
And while we are here, your child’s education on how to be part of a loving and trusting relationship is already well underway. This time, including the baby. That’s why it’s wise to be mindful of what you model. However, it can be especially useful if your child notices that the adults around them are more of a variation on the trust theme. As long as you always practice honesty, practice tact, respect, privacy, need to know, and deep cleansing breaths, you’ll be more or less okay.
Dear Carolyn: I left an abusive marriage 2 years ago so I don’t want to date. My kids have started making comments and expressing sympathy for my loneliness, but I don’t know how or even what I want to do about it. Should I force myself to go back outside or enjoy the peace of being alone?
Anonymous: Oh, no, there is no forced pairing. One day in an abusive marriage is enough for a lifetime. is more than.
However, solitude is not a great option. I’ll be there with your kids.So I hope you work towards your goals friendship Communication network. and/or networks of shared interests, purposes, accomplishments, and meanings. Build as many connections as you want when you’re ready without dating. Date only if you have no doubts about what you want.
Building good relationships takes time, effort, and reflection, and it takes even more time. Additionally, you must be willing to pay close attention to your emotions when spending time with new people. That way, you can determine if the other person is healthy for you. You know they are when you feel safe with them. That means don’t be afraid to piss them off.
This is how you (re)build trust in yourself after abuse. We also offer monotherapy when possible.
When you are confident, you can: 1. Distinguish between healthy and unhealthy attachments. 2. If you feel like you’re not feeling great around someone, walk away. 3. Coping with a painful breakup, that’s peace.peace of solitude and Peace of trustworthy friends.
