Dear Abby: How do I deal with my elderly aunt who has a gambling problem?I live in a town with a casino. She lives in another state 4 hours away. She often calls me and asks me to stay with her, and when I go on a trip, she asks me to use her house.
A year ago, she called me to help her get banned from gambling in her state because she was out of control. She can no longer gamble where she lives and can’t afford a hotel to go to a town with a casino, so she sees me as a gambling escape.
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I have a roommate and I explained that my room is small. I’m not interested in having someone come over to my house who spends hours at the craps table (I care about my health), and I definitely can’t have her as a guest. She won’t give up! Is the only option to end communication with her?
— I’m not betting on her
For non-betters: Screening her calls is also an option. The other thing is to keep repeating the mantra that you can’t let her stay because you have a roommate and your room is too small. Then encourage her to find another hobby. Then she might stop asking you and look for another enabler.
Dear Abby: I’m a middle school student and part of a large group of friends. I have a friend named “Kaylee” who has changed completely over the last year due to another girl’s influence. Kaylee started saying inappropriate things and only talking about boys. She had never had anything like that until she became “best friends” with the other girl. It ruined both their reputations.
I can’t decide if I should confront them or what to say if I do. I don’t want either of them to offend me. We’ve had arguments before, but when someone starts an argument with them, it’s bad for the group. Also, they often get into arguments and somehow the whole group gets involved.
This has been going on for a year and is putting a strain on the group. I don’t know if I can handle anything more. I don’t know if I can easily convince them if I confront them. What should I do?
— More drama in Tennessee
Dear More Drama: You mentioned being part of a large group of friends. You can’t “save” or change Callie, and saying she’s ruining your reputation might come across as jealousy. Start focusing on friendships with other girls in the group instead of conflicting with them. One thing I’ve realized over the last few years is that you can never have enough friends.
To our readers: Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. No Thanksgiving is complete without sharing a traditional prayer written by my beloved late mother.
Oh Heavenly Father,
We thank you for feeding us and remember those who are hungry.
We thank you for your health and remember those who are sick.
We thank you for your friends and remember those who have no friends.
We thank you for giving us freedom and remember those who were enslaved.
May these memories inspire us to service.
May your gift to us be used for the benefit of others.
Amen.
I hope everyone has a fun and safe celebration!
— I love you, Abby
Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com.
