Dear Eric: Our 63-year-old sister, Josie, was more naive, deceived and devoted than a leader. She has no university education, but she always seems to fall into a well-paid job. Over the past seven years, she has reunited with a friend from her previous work. This is when we noticed a dramatic change in her mental state. The family deals with conspiracy theories and beliefs of the aliens who live under Walmart. Josie says she is a star seed on another planet.
She took antidepressants years ago, but then she left. She has recently admitted her anxiety, but she won’t go back to the pill because she doesn’t trust the big pharma company that makes them.
Josie has a daughter who lives out of state and doesn’t know the level of concern we have about her mental state. My nie asked me to visit her with her mom, but I can’t take more than two hours with Josie, let alone a week. Do we have her live her life in Lala’s land or do we suggest that she needs intervention or counseling?
– Sisters involved
Dear Sister: Initially, connecting with an old colleague may have seemed to follow a misguided mindset, but the sudden change suggests that she may be experiencing a mental health crisis. The intervention will help keep her safe.
Tell your nie about your concerns and see if she shares them. You can honestly say that an extended trip is not something you can do, but consider shorter visits with the intention of a better understanding of what is going on in Josie. Open communication between the family about what you are witnessing, reasonable expectations, and what you can do to help is important. You can find resources to implement these pre-conversions and additional support.samhsa.gov).
Write down what you are observing when you hear from Josie. Listen to Josie without judging, and look back at what you are hearing without judging. This makes it easier for her to trust you when suggesting that you provide support or seek professional help.
(Send a question to R. Eric Thomas eric@askingeric.com or PO Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him Instagram Sign up for his weekly newsletter rericthomas.com. )
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