I never noticed any scrapes or bruises on her hands (if she tried to stop the fall). She never goes to the doctor for her treatment. I worry that something else is going on: domestic violence or alcohol abuse?
There is no evidence beyond my suspicion. Should I ask further? If so, what would I say? If her story is true, I would embarrass her greatly, but that is not my intention. What do you advise?
Concerned: I would appreciate it if you could leave a note with a tip when you come next time. “I’ve been concerned about some of the injuries you’ve sustained because I’ve talked to you during my time with you. If someone is hurting you, there is help. The National Domestic Violence Hotline has: , can be reached at the following address: hotline.org, or text the crisis text line (741-741). ”
Dear Amy: My wife and I were lucky enough to get married in Tuscany two years ago. We had a small guest list of close family members and close friends. Neither of us have ever been married.
When we handed the “save the date” message, we understood that traveling to Italy would be daunting, even if four days of food and accommodation were provided, and that people He said he understands if he can’t travel. There have been two postponements due to COVID-19, and two of my friends and their spouses were unable to attend due to the circumstances.
A third friend, “Donny”, told me in the most hurtful way that he and his wife, “Linda”, were not going on the trip. Donnie broke the news to me and told me that my wedding was all delayed, causing them a lot of trouble, and that they have other priorities in life that I’m trying not to achieve. (One specific priority mentioned was all-inclusive sobriety). traveling with another couple).
Linda contacted me once and I told her exactly why I was hurt. She thought I was upset that they just didn’t attend the wedding. Since then, I have seen Donnie and Linda once, and she told me that something needed to be done to mend this relationship. She was hinting that Donnie always hoards everything and never deals with past traumas and conflicts, so if I don’t try, it will never heal.
Amy, I don’t think I should fix this issue. Donnie has never apologized for his hurt, much less has he admitted it (that’s all I want).
Two years later, I still wonder if I should ignore all this and be a bigger person to protect our 20+ year friendship, or is this because some friendships are temporary? I’m wondering if it’s one of those situations you tell me, even if it’s been a very long season?
Frustrated: “Donnie” doesn’t seem to lock things up too much. He looks very positive when expressing his opinions and preferences.
I believe the way to find out if this friendship season is over is to face the insult directly to the person who hurt you.
So far, you’ve made your point to “Linda”, but she seems to have thrown the ball back at you. You should tell Donnie exactly what bothers you and why. His reaction will tell you where you stand on the future of your friendship.
Dear Amy: I just want to say thank you for running.”updatewhich re-runs past questions and provides updates from the writers.
First of all, I think it’s a great idea. Second, these updates moved me to tears. What a great start to the day!
appreciated: As I said, most of these “updates” tend towards happy endings (these were the people who responded). Reading these responses and interacting with certain readers gave me great satisfaction and joy.
© 2023 by Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency.
