In 2010, Lisa Copeland was single again.
A Cleveland-area woman in her early 50s who had been married twice — one for 24 years, the other for two — wasn’t sure where to start looking for a partner.
Copeland tried to get help from a dating coach, but found there were no coaches under 50 who understood the dating dynamics of adults her age. Instead of bawling her eyes out on the phone to her sister, as she had already done, she decided to change her tune.
“Dating in your 20s was about getting married and having kids and cats and dogs and building your own world,” says Copeland, now 68. “Now it’s about having fun and playing.”
But the dangers facing single people over 50 are different from the dangers they encountered when they were single decades ago, and for Copeland and others, learning that lesson is crucial as studies show that sexually transmitted infections (STIs) are surging among older adults at a faster rate than other age groups.
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The rising rates of STIs among older adults can be partially explained by the comfortable lifestyles of the 21st century. Health experts say that older adults are living longer and staying sexually active thanks to advances in medical care. They are more likely to live in senior communities and have multiple partners, but they are less aware than younger generations about using prevention tools such as condoms and regular STI testing.
Part of the problem, experts say, is that this demographic is lacking in education. A larger issue is that people of all ages are uncomfortable talking about sex, especially among older Americans, which makes spreading awareness about sexual health difficult.
“There are a lot of factors at play here,” said Janie Steckenrider, an associate professor at Loyola Marymount University who studies political gerontology, aging and sexuality. “We need to start accepting that older people are sexually active and that sexual interest doesn’t stop at a certain age.”
Sexually Transmitted Diseases Increase Rapidly Among Baby Boomers
While there are more cases of STIs among younger people, experts say it’s the increasing rate of STIs among adults over 55 that is worrying.
From 2012 to 2022, chlamydia cases in this population more than tripled, from 6,084 to 19,776. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The agency’s researchers also found that gonorrhea cases more than quadrupled and syphilis cases increased sevenfold over the same period.
Steckenrider said the increase since 2012 has been “quite dramatic.”
While these illnesses are easily cured with the right combination of antibiotics, they can lead to complications if left untreated. This is especially true for older people, who often have other medical conditions that can be made worse by infection, says Angelina Gangestad, MD, chief of obstetrics and gynecology at University Hospitals in Cleveland, Ohio.
According to the World Health Organization, if women leave chlamydia or gonorrhea untreated, it can cause pelvic inflammatory disease, which can lead to chronic pelvic pain. Men who leave chlamydia untreated can also experience painful infections and swollen joints.
According to the Cleveland Clinic, syphilis can affect every organ system and cause long-term damage to the heart, brain, nerves and eyes.
Dating trends that increase risk of sexually transmitted diseases
Sexually transmitted diseases are increasing at alarming rates among older people, in part because older people are living longer, healthier lives, experts say.
And with the help of menopausal medications and hormone therapy, older adults are likely to stay sexually active longer: Two-thirds of older adults say they’re interested in sex, according to the AARP.
“If older adults are physically healthy, they are more likely to be sexually active and have better sexual performance,” said Gangestad of Ohio State University Hospital.
More adults are also choosing to live in senior communities rather than at home or with their families, leading to increased social and sexual interactions, Steckenrider said.
According to the American Healthcare Association/National Center for Assisted Living, more than 800,000 people in the United States live in assisted living facilities and about 1.5 million live in nursing homes.
Older people often have fewer dating prospects than single people in their 20s.
About 30 percent of American adults over the age of 50 are single, widowed or divorced. According to 2022 data from the Pew Research CenterAmong adults under 30, the figure was 47%.
Women live, on average, six years longer than men According to the National Center for Health Statistics. Research suggests While men of all ages tend to have more partners than women, experts say the trend may be more pronounced among older men because there are fewer men to date.
Older people are also more likely to meet online through dating apps, where partners don’t know each other’s sexual histories and have more options, making it easier to date multiple partners.
“This is a generation that came of age during the sexual revolution of the 1960s and ’70s, which challenged monogamy and traditional gender roles,” Steckenrider said. They’re carrying these ideas about sex and free love into later years, but they’re failing to adopt the safe-sex elements that were taught to younger generations.
Sex education and prejudice
Experts say having multiple partners or engaging in anonymous sex wouldn’t be as much of a problem if older adults took advantage of the prevention tools available to protect themselves against STIs. The problem is that they don’t.
This generation may have grown up in a “free love” generation, but it wasn’t until the 1980s that education about STIs was incorporated into comprehensive curricula. According to Planned Parenthood:.
Gangestad, of University Hospitals of Ohio, said that while teens of that generation were learning about birth control, teachers didn’t focus on sexually transmitted diseases. “There’s an age group where they’re no longer worried about pregnancy, so they don’t think about using condoms in the same way.”
By the time HIV became a public health crisis in the 1980s, many older adults were in monogamous relationships and had families, Steckenrider said, so sexually transmitted diseases weren’t a concern for them then, and they aren’t a concern now.
“There’s a disconnect for a lot of older adults. They don’t see themselves as being at risk,” says Fred Wyand, a sexual health expert and director of communications for the American Sexual Health Association (ASHA).
Experts say testing and screening can help prevent the spread of STIs, but health care providers are less likely to offer tests to older patients than younger ones.
Because patients may not show signs of STIs, and symptoms may be similar to those associated with certain medications or other health conditions, health care providers may not think to ask about testing for STIs.
Doctors “tend to assume older adults aren’t sexually active, so they don’t routinely ask about their sexual health,” Steckenrider said. “Unless older adults bring it up with their health care provider, it’s not something that’s talked about.”
How to reverse a trend
Experts say awareness and education are key to reversing soaring STI rates among older people.
Doctors need to feel comfortable broaching the topic of sex and STIs with older patients, and older patients need to know what questions to ask.
“This can be uncomfortable for both patients and providers,” says Wyandt, and it can be hard for older patients to discuss these topics with their doctors, who are often much younger than them.
To start these conversations, The organization presents 10 questions During your health check, you can ask your health care provider questions such as, “Where can I get tested?” and “How often should I get tested?”
Sexual health experts also suggest that educators bring materials about sex and sexually transmitted diseases to senior living communities, senior centers, libraries, hospitals and other locations where older adults might come across them.
Spreading information about testing is also key, experts say. ASHA and virtual care provider Everlywell teamed up to host a national testing day on September 30 to spread awareness. The company is offering 250 free at-home kits to test for chlamydia and gonorrhea, which normally cost $69 each.
“The stigma is not just an issue for older people, it’s a barrier to talking about anything to do with sex,” Wyand said.
But dating after 50 doesn’t have to be awkward, said Copeland, who started dating again in 2010, reflecting on her own experience. In fact, it can be fun.
Having found joy in her love life, she launched the website FindAQualityMan.com in 2012 to help other women over 50 navigate the seemingly daunting world of dating. She always advises her clients to discuss safe sex with their prospective partners and to use condoms and lubricant.
“We don’t want you to feel guilty, but we want you to be safe,” Copeland said. “It’s good to satisfy your hormones.”
Adrianna Rodriguez can be reached at [email protected].
