Grandiose narcissism is a personality trait characterized by an exaggerated sense of self-importance, a constant desire for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. People with grandiose narcissism believe they are superior to others, have a sense of entitlement, and seek to control social interactions. They may exaggerate their accomplishments, expect special treatment, and take advantage of others to achieve their goals.
“Granditude is commonly expressed through arrogance, self-enhancement tactics (blatant displays of greatness or attractiveness), and social boldness (such as appointing oneself to a leadership position),” says the author in 2022. Kennedy Balzen, lead author of the paper, explains. study About narcissism and relationships.
the study Grandiose narcissism is characterized by narcissistic admiration and narcissistic rivalry, i.e. common goal Strengthening and maintaining an inflated self-concept, often at the expense of intimate relationships.
Here we explain how two core characteristics of grandiose narcissism can negatively impact romantic relationships.
1. Narcissistic praise
Narcissistic admiration refers to the strong desire for attention, admiration, and adoration that individuals with narcissistic traits seek from others. This helps strengthen their fragile self-esteem and justify their exaggerated sense of self-importance.
This search for admiration can affect relationships due to narcissistic traits such as:
- Needs constant attention. People who exhibit grandiose narcissism crave constant recognition, admiration, and special treatment from others and engage in behaviors that draw attention to themselves, such as boasting about their accomplishments, seeking compliments, and dominating conversations. Take action to collect. They may have a confident charm at first, but over time their self-centeredness can strain relationships.
- exaggerated self-image. Grandiose narcissism involves the belief that one is special, attractive, or successful. If narcissists do not receive the admiration they desire for these perceived traits, they may begin to feel resentful or contemptuous of others, leading to a cycle of idealization and devaluation. . At first, you may idealize your partner and give them attention and affection in order to earn their admiration. However, when a partner fails to meet unrealistic expectations or challenges their partner’s superiority, the narcissist may devalue their partner, downplay their accomplishments, or pursue new sources of admiration. You may want to throw it away completely.
- Manipulative behavior. Narcissists use manipulative tactics to garner admiration and may engage in charm attacks, flattery, or manipulation to persuade others. However, this behavior is often superficial and insincere, ultimately leading to conflict and a lack of true connection.
- Difficulty maintaining intimacy. Genuine intimacy requires mutual empathy, respect, and emotional vulnerability, and narcissists often lack these qualities. This makes it difficult to form deep and meaningful connections with others. They find it difficult to empathize with their partner’s feelings or prioritize their own needs, resulting in a one-sided relationship.
2. Narcissistic rivalry
Narcissistic competition involves defensive strategies aimed at protecting one’s self-image through aggressive behavior toward others. This trait reflects deep-seated insecurities and a constant desire to maintain a sense of superiority. People with high narcissistic competitiveness may engage in exploitative behavior or be jealous of the achievements of others because it threatens their grandiose self-image.
In relationships, narcissistic competitiveness can have serious and detrimental effects. Here’s how it manifests itself:
- Sensitivity to criticism. A narcissist person is fragile self-esteem And they are very sensitive to criticism and rejection. When faced with feedback that challenges our self-image, we may react defensively, angry, or aggressively rather than trying to resolve relationship issues in a healthy way.
- envy and resentment. A narcissistic partner may try to be better than the other person to protect their self-image.continuous comparison and envy This can lead to anger over their accomplishments, sabotage, or attempts to undermine their confidence. For example, you might criticize a presentation of important work your partner has done to make you feel superior. This can create feelings of hostility, betrayal, and anxiety rather than the important dynamics of cooperation and support.
- Confrontational and aggressive behavior. Narcissistic rivalry can manifest as frequent arguments, power struggles, gaslighting, and emotional manipulation in relationships. Narcissists tend to rely on hostility and intimidation to maintain a sense of control, creating an environment of fear and tension that can lead to: low satisfaction with interpersonal relationshipspushing romantic partners away or trapping them in abusive relationship dynamics.
- Lack of constructive communication. A lack of empathy can exacerbate conflicts and prevent meaningful communication and compromise. The arrogant attitude of this person, who has traits of grandiose narcissism, can make it difficult to resolve conflicts constructively, as he tends to focus only on his own desires, ignoring his partner’s perspective and feelings. there is.
These competitive dynamics can make it difficult for partners to feel emotionally safe and valued, which can persist even after the relationship ends. 2021 study investigated the post-breakup emotional responses of people with grandiose narcissism and found that both narcissistic rivalry and admiration were associated with greater anger toward their ex-partner.
Furthermore, researchers found that trait admiration was associated with more positive perceptions of ex-partners, rivalry was associated with negative bias toward ex-partners, while narcissistic admiration was associated with more positive perceptions of ex-partners, while narcissistic admiration They also found that they were more likely to break up. , highlighting the superficial nature of their romantic connection.
Initially, a person may appear with grandiose narcissism. naturally attractiveThey are confident and charming, but over time, their true intentions begin to surface and derail their relationship as their narcissistic rivalry rears its ugly head.
Exploitative, jealous, and confrontational behaviors associated with this trait undermine trust This creates resentment and ultimately makes the narcissistic partner disliked, making it difficult to maintain a long-term relationship.
It is imperative that individuals involved in them set boundaries, prioritize their own well-being, and seek support if they feel trapped in these relationship dynamics. It is also important for narcissistic people to seek support to develop self-awareness, overcome self-promoting and hostile tendencies, and build healthier, longer-lasting relationships.
Want to know if you have narcissistic tendencies? Take this evidence-based assessment to find out: narcissism scale