Psychopaths don’t just appear in prisons, crime documentaries, and horror movies. Some walk among us.
In fact, you probably know one too.
“Everyone knows someone who is a psychopath.” abigail marshprofessor of psychology and neuroscience at Georgetown University. psychopathy isAn organization dedicated to alleviating the suffering caused by psychopathy says: “You may think this problem has nothing to do with you, but it does. I’m sure you know at least one psychopath.”
Psychopaths do not experience empathy, guilt, or remorse. As a result, they have no problem hurting or exploiting others to get what they want. They can make great serial killers or CEOs and can be very attractive when it comes to dating. Judy Hosays a clinical and forensic neuropsychologist.
“Some of the psychopathic tactics of how to approach people and win their trust can be very appealing at first,” Ho said, adding that about 1% to 3% of the general population, and 6% to 8% of the general population. % added that this was the case. There are psychopaths among leaders and executives. “Now that you’ve finally found someone who truly understands and cares about you, it’s easy to put on blinders and ignore the signs that things aren’t going well and that there’s something sinister lurking underneath. ”
What is psychopathy?
Psychopath is a colloquial term that refers to a person with traits of antisocial personality disorder.
Marsh said that psychopathic traits include impulsivity, boldness, and “a dominant and fearless personality,” but that “meanness is actually at the heart of a psychopath,” and that “there is no concern for the well-being of others.” There is also a “cold and indifferent attitude.”
Both social and genetic factors can drive people to antisocial behavior, Marsh said, and many psychopaths come from loving families.
Ho said there is a spectrum of psychopaths and that psychopaths may have talents that “move a company or organization forward.”
“Getting into the more serious side of this spectrum includes things like a lack of empathy, using people as pawns for one’s own goals without caring about their feelings or desires, and a highly self-centered, narcissistic nature. “We get angry whenever we feel like someone is arguing with us or criticizing us, even if it’s constructive and well-intentioned,” Ho says.
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All that matters to psychopaths is getting what they want, and they don’t care who they hurt or wrong in the process.
Although psychopaths don’t care about other people, they are still motivated to date if doing so helps them achieve a desired goal. For example, a psychopath may seek a relationship to exploit someone financially, to distract from other nefarious activities, or simply to have sex.
“In fact, we see this with serial killers and mass murderers. They seemingly live normal lives,” Ho said. “Many of them, for example, were actually married and had children and actually maintained some kind of employment so that the community wouldn’t necessarily suspect them.”
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Like narcissists, many psychopaths seek admiration. But whereas narcissists do this to feed their egos, psychopaths see praise as a tool to get what they want, Marsh says. And while many psychopaths truly believe they can outsmart others, Ho says it’s a myth that psychopaths are more intelligent than the average person.
“Everything helps,” Marsh says. “It’s all just about achieving a goal, and you seek praise, status, and recognition because it’s useful. Getting those things helps you get what you want.”
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Psychopaths are difficult to spot, and their manipulations are usually only discovered if done poorly, Marsh said. Here are some red flags to look out for if your date is a psychopath.
- They strategically love bombs: “It’s not just love bombing for the sake of love bombing,” Ho said. “They tend to be more specific. They seem to find something that’s really personal to you and make it their life goal to make that part of your life better for you.”
- They seem too generous: Gifts from psychopaths often come with strings attached. “They may be trying to manipulate you by giving you everything they think you want, and then you feel like you owe them something,” Marsh says.
- They keep you focused: Unlike narcissists who need the spotlight, “psychopaths talk about you on the first date, but it’s all very strategic,” says Ho. “They’re trying to get information, figure out where your weaknesses are, where you’re hurting, and use that to bring you closer to them.”
- They want to isolate you: “Once you start trusting them, they slowly start to alienate you from the rest of your life,” says Ho.
- They crave control. “At first, you’ll say, ‘Okay, so I want to make sure my location is turned on so I can get home safely from work.'” It was like, ‘This is it,'” Ho said.
- They disappear without a trace. Ho said psychopaths have difficulty maintaining long-term commitments, such as jobs or relationships. Take note if your dating history has a spotty work history or other inconsistencies. “They bounce from job to job, relationship to relationship, and if someone doesn’t give them what they want, they move on,” Ho says. “When things don’t go your way, they disappear, so you never get a chance to really see them at their worst.”
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