Can you recognize the signs that you're dating a narcissist? Or do you just suspect that there's something “not quite right” about your relationship?
Regardless of your level of understanding, narcissism in relationshipsIf you think you're dating a narcissist, it's important to know what to expect so you're not caught off guard later.
Is it possible that you are dating a narcissist? how do you know? What are the signs?
Here are 9 little surprising signs that you're dating a narcissist.
1. It was too strong at first.
Desire is a part of any relationship, but that desire can very quickly lead to one partner telling the other how much they “love” each other and want to spend the rest of their lives with them. It can be a cause for concern when they start telling you how they can't imagine life without them.
Narcissists often develop superficial connections early in a relationship, before they even get to know someone.
2. All conversations are about yourself.
Narcissists love attention. They love to talk about themselves and how great they are.
They tend to exaggerate their accomplishments in an attempt to make themselves look better. In some cases, it may be difficult to understand the words accurately.
3. They thrive on compliments.
Narcissists often seem to have high self-esteem, but they need constant praise. And if you don't give it to them, they'll catch it.
They often use others to increase their self-worth and feel more powerful.
4. They lack empathy.
Empathy is the ability to see and feel what another person is feeling. Narcissists are unable to understand the subjective experiences of others.
Often, we are unable to make others feel validated, understood, or accepted.
5. They don't have many lifelong friends.
It is difficult for a narcissist to suppress relationships of any kind. They may talk about friends, but they could probably be acquaintances, casual friends, or even sworn enemies.
They also tend to get angry if you mention their friends or try to make plans with someone other than their friends.
6. They always bully you.
A little teasing here and there can be harmless and fun in any relationship, but when it's mean or constant, it becomes tiresome. You may feel like you can't do anything right or that what you're doing isn't good enough.
They don't like the clothes you wear, the color of your hair, or the shows you watch on TV.
A narcissist's disapproval and criticism often begins subtly and increases over time.
7. They distort your reality.
They may fabricate the truth, tell lies, or falsely accuse others in the name of controlling your life. This is called gaslighting and is a form of manipulation and emotional abuse.
Examples include saying your mom didn't answer your phone calls because she no longer cares, or that you met a friend at an event, eliciting feelings of being left out and unloved.
8. They think they are always right and never apologize.
There is Don't argue or compromise with a narcissist. It feels like they aren't listening to you at all and don't understand you.
They rarely, if ever, take responsibility for anything and rarely apologize if they do something wrong.
9. I panic when trying to get things done.
You may have realized that things don't feel right and tried to end the relationship. Your partner probably panicked, promised to change, and became very affectionate and affectionate.
They may also say mean things to you, saying things like, “You don't know how to live without me,'' or they may try to turn your friends or family against you.
Narcissists can seem incredibly attractive before you even get to know them.
Therefore, it is important to recognize the signs of narcissistic abuse in advance.
They may have been too attractive when you first met. They may have gone above and beyond to express their interest in you by leaving you a love note or showing up with a lavish gift.
They may have said they love you after a few weeks together. But then something happened.
Maybe you didn't call after you got home from a get-together with friends. Maybe you had a work meeting and couldn't meet for lunch. Or maybe you decide it's better to go to bed early than watch a movie together.
Whatever it was, perhaps something disappointed your loved one and things have not been the same since then.
This is what people who have had relationships with narcissists often describe as the turning point where things changed in their relationship.
Photo: Diego Cervo (via Shutterstock)
Narcissists can be difficult to spot, especially when in a romantic relationship.
Generally, you don't pay attention to the obvious signs of narcissism. Often you get caught up in the charm you once had, the charming demeanor that got your attention.
Dating a narcissist can leave you feeling drained, lost, defeated, and down on yourself.
You should always practice self-care and cultivate healthy friendships. Seeking support can help you get out of this relationship and heal yourself.
Babita Spinelli I am a psychotherapist and CEO of Opening the Doors Psychotherapy and Embrace Coaching.
This article was originally published at: psychotherapy that opens the door. Reprinted with permission from the author.
