I often struggle with anxiety, and stimuli hit me harder than most people. But I’m grateful, because over the decades, I’ve learned all about staying calm from this experience. Mental health is maintained by good physical health and thought management, which are cultivated as long-term practices. But sometimes stressful times make you tense, and you need short-term strategies that work quickly and effectively.
Here are seven magical habits that will calm even the most anxious person.
1. Shallow Nose Breathing
As Patrick McKeown puts it in his excellent book: The benefits of oxygenIn it, he reveals the problem with the commonly heard advice to “take a deep breath when you’re nervous.” The problem is that because of the way our bodies absorb and process carbon dioxide (CO2), when we breathe deeply we unconsciously absorb more CO2.
Your body and brain need more oxygen to stay calm, but holding your breath because of anxiety deprives you of it. Take eight long, slow, shallow breaths through your nose (inhale for 5-9 seconds, exhale for 5-9 seconds), relaxing your whole body on the exhale. This will make all the difference.
2. Read fiction
Reading is like an active meditation. Reading and overthinking use your mind in a totally different way. Read a story and let yourself get lost in your imagination for a few minutes. Test your ability to visualize the scene in your mind. Listen to the sounds, take in the environment and be present. Reading calms the mind as you can’t overthink or read.
3. Relax
It may seem obvious, but it’s crazy to forget this. Many people keep their bodies as stiff as a toy truck because they believe they need to be stiff to be safe. This is not true. The more tense your body is, the more stressed you feel. Tension is the opposite of performance in any situation. The solution? Drop your shoulders. Breathe from your belly to your groin. Scan your body to regain sensation. Release. This makes all the difference.
4. Core relaxation exercises
What I learned from a strength coach Elliot HulseOne thing that has helped me many times is abdominal relaxation exercises. When we feel anxious, our typical response is to tense up our abdomen, a result of thousands of years of protecting our torso from blows and punches. But we can tense up even when there is no threat.
To start, stand up and hinge at the mid-hips, leaning back slightly with your hands on your hips. Next, breathe in and out through your mouth into your stomach. When you exhale, make a loud, husky “ha-ha” sound. As you do this, let your stomach and body vibrate. Adjust your posture so that you vibrate more while breathing. This is the movement that releases tension in your stomach.
5. Focus on listening
When we feel anxious or panicked, we focus all our attention on ourselves. We evaluate our performance or feel anxious about the anxiety itself. We feel pressured. Our priority is to turn our attention outward. Concentrating on what the person is saying or our surroundings (if we can) helps with this. If we are outside, we focus our attention on birds, cars, etc. Prioritizing listening quiets the mind and allows us to better understand what the other person is saying. This helps us feel connected and centered.
6. Go on a little awareness walk.
There’s nothing like a walk to get out of your head and get back to the feeling of movement. Calmness always makes you more aware and less self-conscious. That is, overthinking makes us more irritable. So while walking, especially mindful walking, you pay more attention to your surroundings and slow down your movements as you walk. Even a five-minute walk can help you feel calmer.
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7. Ask yourself: What is funny, interesting, fun, or interesting about this moment?
Questions are extremely effective at redirecting the trajectory of our thoughts. When we are anxious, we are wallowing in a quicksand of chaotic, meaningless thoughts. When we ask questions, especially questions that encourage us to look for beauty in the world, we become new people.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps people leverage their knowledge and skills to build a profitable personal brand, while staying mentally strong.
